A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. “Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3:00 in the morning!” He slams the door and returns to bed. “Who was that?” asked his wife. “Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he answers. “Did you help him?” she asks. “No, I did not, it is 3:00 in the morning and it is pouring rain out there!” “Well, you have a short memory,” says his wife. “Can’t you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself! God loves drunk people too.” The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?” “Yes,” comes back the answer. “Do you still need a push?” calls out the husband. “Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark. “Where are you?” asks the husband. “Over here on the swing set,” replied the drunk.
-START WORKING ON THE 13th AWWW YEAH MONEY MAKIN TIME!!!
-My hand smells like gas… oops
-The meeting I had to find out when I work was at 215. I thought It was at 115. So I waited over an hour for about a 5-10 minute meeting. Go me. Big Thanks to the lady receptionist who gave me her paper to read an kept me entertained for a good chunk of that waiting period.
-While I was waiting and reading the paper, one kid went into the office and what I’m assuming were his mother and sister were waiting outside for him to finish his meeting. It’s just the three of us, and they decide to talk about whatever the shit it is or that they felt. One of these topics included one of them cutting themselves while shaving, and bitching about that. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT THAT YOU CUT YOURSELF SHAVING, YOU HO. Plus that fact that you were talking in one of those Guidette Long Island accents didn’t help my opinion of you. But seriously, public conversations? Learn what you should say, especially in a room with 3 people. Bish please.
HERE I COME
along mit my DAS BOOT and A BLANKET!!!
- Four years later, Germany’s most discussed 2010 World Cup hero wasn’t ultimately a football player or a coach. Did German national team players believe in the predictions of Paul the Octopus?
- Basti: (laughs) Yeah, we watched it! And, as you see he was right - even in regard to the semi-final against Spain.
- Did you discuss the unpatriotic choices of this octopus?
- Basti: Yes, we joked on this topic.
- Did you want to eat him for that?
- Basti: He died later himself. So everything is okay. (smiles)